Sick

As a young, strapping, single, youth pastor, I hate being sick. I hate being sick period...even when I wasn't in this position of leadership. But here is why I hate it even more now:

First, people feel the need to mother me and/or tell me what I need to do or not do......all the time! Now, if you are one of my good friend's or a family member, I tolerate it. But these people do not know me that well. It's like certain people flock toward those who are sick or in pain. It's almost like their drug...they have to be around it. But I did not ask for people's opinions or diagnoses or thoughts on what I am doing wrong; NOR do I like people mothering me. My mom is the only one who get's to do that; I like it when she does it, not those I barely know (to those of you who think this is an attack on you, I GUARANTEE IT IS NOT. I'M JUST VENTING).
Second, I realize how much I miss my family. I miss my mom and her insight and her help. I am a total momma's boy and since moving to Cincinnati I realize how much of a momma's boy I really am!! It's bad!! And oh so good :-)

Anyways, to steal from Mark Driscoll, I'm venting on this here guy because I really can't afford therapy; this blog will just have to do. <3

A lot on the Noggin'

I havn't been sleeping too well the last week or so. I have not fallen asleep as fast as I usually do, especially since I've been exhausted nearly every night this last month, and I have not been sleeping in as long as I usually do. I am going to attribute it all to my mind pulling a "Lightning Mcqueen" the last few weeks. Yes, my mind has been moving at an alarming pace...Thinking about anything and everything. I am natuarlly a "thinker" so I am not too frustrated (yet) but trying to control mind, which is Biblical. Too much thinking can be unhealthy, just as not thinking at all is detrimental, and I want to have a healthy balance. The mind is truly a battlefield!!

So, this is what I did this morning when I got into the office: I usually spend my first hour and a half in the scriptures, worship, devotionals, solitude, journaling, etc. However, this morning I grabbed my USC Trojans pillow off a chair, layed down in the middle of my floor, and rested. This was unique for me since I am so driven, feeling the need to never waste time, to keep busy...to always be doing something. But I was so tired this morning, I felt the need to just "rest in God"; to lay down and hit the PAUSE button before I got started on this busy Wednesday. I didn't fall completely asleep, but that was not the goal. The goal was to do no-thing...to Rest and ask God to refresh me. The goal was to quiet the mind, to lay down every part of me, not just the physical part though I did symbolically. It was truly different for me and will take some getting used to. However, if our minds are a battlefield (and they are) I feel this may be a good exercise for me to participate in every once in a while in order to recalibrate and refresh my thinking. God knows I want to serve Him, but sometimes I am unhealthy in the process of being a follower of Jesus. God, quiet our minds. May we find rest in You.

Slacker

I am a slacker!! I realize that it has been almost two months since I posted last! I figured that is unacceptable, therefore I am going to step my game up.

Enough of that. Something cool happened to me yesterday. I was exiting a typical study session at my Starbucks and as I got into my car a man came up to my window asking for some help. His car ran out of gas and he needed a couple gallons to get to his wife who had his wallet and money. I gave him a 5 and he was on his way. I kid you not, NOT 30 seconds later...AS I'M DRIVING AWAY TO MY APARTMENT, a general manager of TGI Friday's flags me down. He is stranded and needs to get to his car, which is in the shop, a couple exits up the freeway. I have him hop in and help him with the situation! That has NEVER happened to me in my life! Within literally a couple of minutes I was able to help a two stranded guys. I do not believe in coincidences and Jesus' words "...I was a stranger and you welcomed me...as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me" were playing in my mind throughout the whole experience.
I now pray every morning: "God, reveal yourself to me today. Help me to be others-centered and give me an opportunity to show your love." ...I believe He did just that and will continue to do so.