Parents Night

I love parents!! This last Wednesday night we conducted our first "Parents Night" to inform the parents of our teenagers. This was an opportunity for them to hear me speak to them from my heart about the youth ministry. We catered in some delicious spaghetti and bread sticks and had a Question and Answer session facilitated by one of my students. It was a great time, and for my first time ever doing this I feel it went off well.

I love parents!! Did I mention that already? It is so tough to be a parent, especially nowadays! It is a great challenge and youth pastors often make it more difficult. It is my belief that part of being a youth pastor is coming alongside parents and helping them with their kids...NOT telling them HOW to parent or blowing them off or ignoring them or never engaging them (Getting the point?) or whatever else. I believe that parents are our greatest asset in youth ministry. There are a couple of things I am working on right now with parents and I thought I would share (The ABC's):

1. Authentically Listen. Give the parents a voice. Many times parents DO NOT feel they have a voice in their kids' lives, and it only adds to their frustration when we don't listen to them too. Therefore, provide avenues for their voice to be heard: Email out a quarterly questionnaire, take a parent out to coffee and ask for their opinion on specific events, and or set up a parent advisory team where they provide input on anything from administrative stuff to midweek gatherings to large events. The sky is the limit. Yes, we will not always agree, especially on methodology. However, that does not negate the necessity of giving a listening ear.
   
2. Build Friendship. Sure, not every parent is going to be your friend and it will look different for every parent who does end up being a friend. BUT, it is good to be friends with some of the parents of teens. There is something refreshing about engaging parents in friendship. In the Context of friendship, they can be a rock solid support, a safe place for you, and give sound advice (which is taken completely different when coming from a friend!).
   
3. Clearly Communicate. Most parents just want to be informed. They want to know what is going on. This is a GOOD THING!!! It means they care for the well-being of their child...just like the youth pastor and leaders do! Therefore, Clearly Communicating Consistently is crucial. Send out email updates, postcards, bulletin announcements, etc. Most parent to youth pastor problems occur because effective communication does not take place.
   
4. Develop Parent Leaders. Plug parents in to leadership!! I am quickly finding that some parents (NOT all or most) will make great youth leaders. At the very least, they are great assets in helping with specific events, fund raising and/or administrative help. We can always use the help!

I know I am not an expert, but considering last Wednesday night, I thought it beneficial to jot down some of what I was thinking.

Thoughts? Comments?